


Gotham's Destruction via Pranks

by Numbuh_7



Series: Batfam Drabbles and shorts [2]
Category: Batman - All Media Types
Genre: Batfamily (DCU), Crack, Fluff, Gen, Prank Wars, Pranks
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-31
Updated: 2021-01-31
Packaged: 2021-03-18 03:08:08
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 881
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29111313
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Numbuh_7/pseuds/Numbuh_7
Summary: A -hopefully funny- short story of the bat family getting caught up in a prank war that threatens to destroy Gotham.
Series: Batfam Drabbles and shorts [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2189184
Kudos: 43





	Gotham's Destruction via Pranks

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [Prompt](https://archiveofourown.org/external_works/752724) by Writing Prompts. 



> Inspired by a post by Writing Prompts:  
> "You are a lowlife thug who just came to Gotham looking for work. The city is in total chaos, All the muggers, gangsters, thugs and some renowned supervillains too struggle to flee the city. You get hold of one such criminal and ask him what happened, he says "The Bat finally snapped."

It all started innocently enough, Tim was investigating a candy factory that was a front for selling illegal drugs. He had gotten a hold of some ‘candy’ produced in that factory and was in the Batcave to test it. Tim had put one piece in a machine to analyze it and had the rest in a baggy by the machine. Before he got the results, however, something came up, an emergency notification of an Arkham breakout. 

Hours later, when the bats began returning to the cave, Dick noticed Tim’s things strewn about a table near the testing machines. He was trying to be helpful and pack the stuff up for Tim, putting the folders away, and grabbing a sweater and the candies to bring up to Tim, figuring it was just regular candy Tim had been snacking on while he was working. When Dick got upstairs Tim had his head buried in his laptop, waving his brother off when Dick brought him his sweater and the candies. He left both items on Tim’s dresser and went to bed, neither thinking anything of it. 

All the bats had stayed overnight at the mansion after the Arkham breakout, and hours later Jason stopped by Tim’s room on his way downstairs, only to find Tim passed out on his bed. Jason smiled at the sight before him, Tim sleeping sprawled out on his bed with his laptop still on his chest. Jason entered the room to move the laptop before it slipped. He picked up the laptop, tucked Tim in, and moved the laptop to Tim’s dresser, which was where the bag of candy was. Jason was hungry, the candies looked good, and he figured Tim wouldn’t mind.

He only discovered his mistake hours later when he got sick. The multiple mixups that resulted in the candy being in Tim’s room, and in Jason eating it, had resulted in Jason eating what they would discover to be an experimental laxative. 

Fortunately, they discovered it in time. Although Jason was pretty mad, he didn’t spend nearly as much time in the bathroom as he would have otherwise. He first thought Tim left the candy there on purpose to prank the first person to steal one, then that Dick moved the candy on purpose. Tim and Dick both felt horrible for what happened. Bruce was furious at all the breaches of protocol that had occurred.

Revenge pranks followed, Dick’s cereal getting replaced with cheerios, and Tim’s coffee being replaced with decaf followed. Tim responded by hacking Jason’s phone to play _Cotton-eyed Joe_ every time he got a notification, text, or call. Dick responded by replacing Jason’s smoke bombs with glitter bombs. 

It all escalated from there. Duke wasn’t happy with all the cereal being replaced with cheerios, Damian was mad because he got caught up in the glitter. Bruce got upset at the decaf coffee. And there the prank war started. Jason was alone at first, until a prank from Tim hit Duke by mistake, resulting in a sticky blue liquid ruining Duke’s shirt and getting stuck in his hair. Duke was clearly against Tim after that, and he ended up teaming up with Jason. Tim and Dick teamed up from the beginning. Damian was on his own, aiming for Tim only while trying to avoid hitting Dick with his pranks, which included training Alfred the cat to stalk Tim and leave hairballs in his bed and replacing Tim’s laptop with an identical one that’s completely nonfunctional. He even released spiders in Tim’s bedroom.

Eventually, suits got painted or glitter-ized, weapons got modified or replaced, and the chaos spread to the field. Damian hit Tim with a water balloon mid-battle, leaving the Red Robin uniform dyed purple. Jason and Duke got Dick by replacing his crop tops with identical shirts that were too long instead of too short. Dick and Tim filled the manor with beach balls, Damian replaced the soap in the Batcave showers with blue hair dye, Cass got caught in a few too many pranks and joined with Damian because he was alone. Several pranks followed with the 2 ex-assassins replacing things their siblings were using with completely random or comical objects the moment one looked away.

Eventually, Bruce begged them to stop, causing the bat siblings to turn on him. Soon it was all-out warfare, Bat against Bat, with Gotham in the middle of it.

It started with fights against mere thugs interrupted, but soon even the big villains were getting caught up in it. Joker got taken down with a mass of foam-glue-glitter that left him stuck in a glittering gelatinous blob Arkham still hadn’t rid him of. Riddler found himself dyed purple and trapped in a giant rubber duck, somehow. Penguin now had an extreme fear of Tony the Tiger, the iceberg lounge having been the unfortunate victim of a weaponized Tony the Tiger impression, which Damian used _during_ a fight.

Gotham was on the verge of destruction, many citizens and buildings marred by pranks gone wrong, and all because of a prank war among the bat family, with most attributing the destruction with Batman joining, as things had been funny but not so dangerous before he joined, but everything went up a level when Batman joined the prank war.

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading! I hope you liked it! Feel free to leave a comment if you feel like it.


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